This Memorial Day weekend we are remembering all of our loved ones we lost to war, disaster, or natural causes. Unfortunately for our friends, family, and neighbors in Joplin, this Memorial Day is salt in an open wound, for they have lost many loved ones to a EF-5 tornado. Such a clinical term for something so vicious that it has ripped families apart in mere minutes and left a community stumbling through the wreckage. The only difference between this and 9/11 is the fact that there were no terrorists to blame, only Mother Nature. That is cold comfort to those in Joplin and all of the neighbors, family, and friends.
The silver lining in this is to see that this was not just a Joplin tragedy, or a Missouri tragedy, but a shared tragedy as volunteers and resources have been pouring in from all over the country. For those who could not come or afford to send resources, they are sending prayers and love. Prayers and love are much better than blame and scorn. This will be my only reference (I hope) to that misguided entity out of Topeka, KS which believes that protesting during other people's pain and tragedy will get their message across. It is getting a message across all right and that is another silver lining. Believers and nonbelievers alike have been joining forces to block these offensive protest motions. These forces have been so effective that the WBO did not get plastered all over the news during the Joplin Memorial Service and President Obama's visit.
There are many people I miss that I am going to share with you today. My daddy, Tillman L. Smith, Jr, who served for his country in Vietnam, coming home with invisible battle scars and wounds. He went to Heaven on March 1, 2007 after a sudden, massive heart attack. He was an awesome dad who passed his love on of Cardinals baseball to all of his girls as well as baseball, basketball, and softball. He was passionate about whatever he did. When he gave his life to Christ, he was just as passionate about that too. I miss him so much and the hardest thing is when I want to pick up the phone and call and tell him something, it all comes back to me he's gone on.
Dewayne Winchester, who is free from pain and left behind my best friend Tonica to grieve. He was good to her and that was all I ever asked. He shared our faith so I know I will get to see him again someday.
Debra Moseley, who befriended me my first year in Springfield at Redneck Trailer, lost her life in a head on car accident. One day we were talking and laughing in the office. The next day, she was gone. I still have a small scar on my heart from this. Her widower followed her the next year. She left behind three grieving children as well. I will be looking for her when it is my time to go to Heaven as well.
Burl Hawkins, David's uncle, who was such a sweetheart, always good to talk and reach out for a hug. He had such a strong constitution and fortitude, that when the cancer took him, it didn't really show up until right before he left us. I have no doubts he will greet me and David in Heaven either.
Scotty Vass, my friend Donna Hicks Winder's son. I did have the pleasure of getting to know him when I got to attend Calvary Baptist Church in Poplar Bluff when I was down to see my mom and my dad. He was a young gentleman, had such a sweet personality, big smile, and always ready to help. His sudden death left a big void to his momma, sisters, and family; in addition to his church family and friends. I'm sure Scotty and my daddy are hanging out together up there.
My mother in law (my second mother), Alpha Smith. She was the complete antithesis to the cliche mother-in-law. She was beyond good to me and helped me adjust to married life and country life. I was blessed to have her seven years before a sudden heart attack took her away from us right in front of our eyes. I'm so thankful that a few days before, as David and I were leaving to go to our house, I reached down to hug her and tell her I loved her. She smiled, and gently said, "We love you, too." I can't wait to see her in Heaven. My biggest hurt is that she did not get to see Curtis married and see the beautiful great-grandchildren he and Raychelle provided. The constant hurt is every day Dad (David's dad) wakes up and he misses her all over again. He will tell me I'm sweet, or pretty, or good; but not as sweet, pretty, or good as his wife, and then he cries in my arms and I have lost Mother all over again. In a way, he died that day as well. However, he keeps plugging away because he has me and David and Jade and Curtis and Raychelle and the babies to take care of.
These are most of the people I have lost in the past nine years. I lost all of my grandparents by the time I was in junior high school, and an adopted grandparent in high school. There are pain for these people as well, but I want to remember how those people lived more than how they died.
During this Memorial Day, go ahead and cry for those you have missed....but don't forget to live for them as well.
Beautiful post Steph.
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